Rebecca Writes to Sally

(See the post entitled "Rachel Gratz" for the beginning of this narrative thread.)

Benjamin Gratz wrote of Rebecca many decades later that she had "devoted [her] life to the service of our beloved family," and there is evidence that the unity and well-being of her family came first for her, even before her devotion to religion, good works and education. Her older sister Sally's dislike of the man whom her younger sister Rachel wanted to marry would certainly have caused a family rift if Rebecca could not have convinced Sally to hold her tongue.

Rachel's letter announcing her love for Sol Moses and asking Rebecca to intercede with Sally probably arrived on a Friday, giving Rebecca the Sabbath to contemplate her words before she could pick up her pen on Saturday night.

Rebecca begins her letter by commiserating with Sally and revealing her own distress at the marriage: "What [you have] experienced...I have conjectured from what is passing in my own [heart]." But Rebecca knows, as Sally does too, that there is no way to stop Rachel: "She loves Sol Moses -- her own hand has written it -- her own enthusiastic style most passionately declared it." The sisters will have to accept Sol graciously. Rebecca understands how hard this will be for Sally but she takes it as a given that Sally's better nature will win out: "You dislike Sol, and have so long found it difficult to disguise your opinion that I fear it will not be an easy task; however the goodness of your heart will teach you to sacrifice prejudice where the happiness of our beloved sister is concerned..."

Here Rebecca differentiates her feelings from Sally's: Sally disliked Sol before there seemed any possibility of his entering their family; Rebecca seems to have had less difficulty with him as someone in their circle but the thought of him married to her sister has disturbed her. Yet she makes a plea for him; she is sure, she says, that he loves Rachel and will try to make her happy. She adds that Sol is respected in New York and "tenderly beloved" in his family. She even echoes one of Sally's sarcastic remarks to bring her sister around, "You have often said that you believe he would make any woman happy who could love him [her emphasis] and if contrary to your expectation our sister is that woman should we not strengthen -- confirm that belief rather than cloud it with doubt and apprehension...?"

Rebecca's struggle to bolster Sol's qualities as a good brother-in-law amounts to faint praise, but she has one comfort to offer her sister.

In a postscript she says, "Revolving all that I have said I fear my letter will make you melancholy. Do not let it have that effect. I am a little given to imaginary whims, and have a curious notion that the little fairy imp Puck has been making free with his juices."

(Both sisters knew their Shakespeare. Rebecca was referring to A Midsummer Night's Dream in which Puck puts the juices of a magical flower into the eyes of the sleeping Titania, the queen of the fairies, so that she will fall in love with the first thing she sees. He then puts an ass's head on the shoulders of the buffoonish weaver Bottom and wakes Titania up. Rebecca was comparing that mismatched couple, Titania and Bottom, with her beautiful sister Rachel and Sol Moses. It is quite the most devastating criticism she would ever write about anyone and something of a revelation: who knew Rebecca had such humor and malice as well as her many, many virtues?)

Rebecca and Sally would offer only their best wishes and congratulations to the happy couple, but they would have the solace of skewering Sol to each other in private.

For more, see "What was wrong with Solomon Gratz Anyway?

(The letters quoted here are in the Gratz Family Collection, Manuscript Collection No. 72, the American Philosophical Society.)

Rachel's Romance

(This narrative began with the post entitled "Rachel Gratz.")

In May 1806, Solomon Moses was in Philadelphia for another prolonged stay when Rebecca, visiting the Hoffman and the Moses families in New York, received a letter from Rachel reporting that M. L. Moses, Solomon's brother, meant to propose to Rebecca at the first opportunity. Knowing that her sister had no interest in marrying him, Rachel advised avoidance. She also informed Rebecca that her information had come from Solomon who knew that M. L.'s proposal would be unwelcome. Sol's thoughtfulness had an effect; in her next letter Rachel wrote, "[He] has secured my everlasting friendship. I think him much improved in every respect."

This statement seems to have caused Rebecca no alarm. She must have been staggered by Rachel's next letter which began, after a short prelude about a sleepless night, "You my beloved Sister shall decide my future...I will give up the man my heart has chosen if you wish it." The man referred to was, of course, Solomon Moses.

After her characteristically dramatic opening, Rachel recapitulated the emotional events of the previous few weeks, saying that Sol's attentions had been of "the most delicate winning kind." As a result, she "felt...greater agitation than any other gentlemen ever occasioned me...every day has increased those feelings and I cannot myself account for this change but I have learned from my heart to love him." The evening before, he had stopped her as she was walking home with a cousin and asked her to walk with him. They were "both embarrassed," she wrote, and when Sol asked if he would ever be happy again? she didn't understand at first. Then she realized that it was she who could make him happy by becoming his wife. She had told him she looked upon his proposal with favor but that she wanted to write Rebecca and receive an answer before they told her family.

Then Rachel comes to the point of the letter. (Despite all the drama at the beginning, both Rebecca and she knew nothing was going to stop her from doing what she wanted.) Rachel was really concerned about Sally's reaction to her engagement to Solomon Moses, probably fearing that her sister's response would be so vitriolic that it would be difficult ever to forgive. She asked that Rebecca break the news since Sally "loves you so much better than she loves me."

What could Rebecca say to Sally to prevent a family rift? And how did Rebecca really feel about Sol as a brother-in-law? Even the quietest and most respectable lives (and blogs) have their cliffhangers.

For more, see "Rebecca Writes to Sally."

(The letter in which Rachel says that Sol had secured her "everlasting friendship" is in the Gratz Collection at the American Jewish Historical Society; the other two letters are from the Gratz Family Collection, Manuscript Collection No. 72, the American Philosophical Society. Thanks to to the Gilbert Stuart blog for the use of the image of the painting of Solomon Moses by Gilbert Stuart. The original is on loan at the Rosenbach Museum and Library.)

(If you would like to learn more about M. L. Moses' attempts to propose to Rebecca, see the post, "Washington Irving, Rebecca Gratz and an Unwanted Suitor," from November 17, 2009.)

The Gratz Sisters & Solomon Moses

Solomon Moses would seem to have been an ideal beau for Rachel Gratz. His parents, Isaac and Reyna Moses, had lived in Philadelphia in the 1770's and 1780's and were old friends of Michael and Miriam Gratz. Solomon himself was actively involved in business with his father in New York, was seven years older than Rachel (a five-to-ten-year age difference between husband and wife was the norm in the Gratz's social set), Jewish, not bad looking -- and yet--.

The Gratz sisters were most appreciative of the hospitality offered by Mr. and Mrs. Moses whenever they visited New York, and especially grateful for the way the Moses family had taken their friends the Fenno's under their wing immediately after Maria and her siblings had moved to the city. But the affection and respect they felt for the parents, and also for Solomon's older sister Richea Levy, did not extend to Solomon.

In the Gratz letters, as usual discreet about male admirers, not much is said about Solomon until 1804, when he came to Philadelphia for a stay of several months. Rachel was away at her sister Fanny Etting's in Baltimore, leaving Sarah (called Sally) and Rebecca to entertain him. After about two months of his presence, Rebecca wrote to Rachel that he had "not gone yet...he waits to see you." (Rebecca in the letter underlines the portion which is reproduced here in italics.) Underlining was not characteristic of Rebecca's writing style, and I interpret it to indicate that even patient, tactful Rebecca was getting tired of Sol's prolonged presence. Rachel replied, in reference to him: "You must be having a charming time of it. At least Sally must." Sally was indeed having a "charming time." She wrote that the stupidity of Sol's conversation rendered her stupid.

This seems to be the situation vis-a-vis Solomon and the Gratz sisters in 1804: Solomon was in love with Rachel and Rachel indifferent to him, at best. Meanwhile, Rebecca found him wearisome and irritable Sarah could not stand him. Matters would remain so until the spring of 1806.

For more, see "Rachel's Romance."

(Rebecca's and Sarah's letters are from the Gratz Family Collection, Manuscript Collection No. 72, the American Philosophical Society, and Rachel's response is in the Gratz Collection at the American Jewish Historical Society. Thanks to the Gilbert Stuart blog at gilbertstuart.blogspot.com for the use of the image of the painting of Solomon Moses by Gilbert Stuart.)